Sitting alone in a low-budget airline late in the evening with
more than an hour of travel ahead gives way too much time to retrospect,
introspect and n other things..In short, once you are done admiring the
cute stewards ( well.. these days the number of stewards equal the number of
stewardess !) and have asked for water more than once, you are just stuck with
what goes on inside your head. Having gone through a similar experience just a
day ago, I had picked
up a book at the bookstore in the airport. One glance at the prices on the in
flight menu made me realize that the neatly packed non – veg meals are gonna
remain only a visual treat and nothing
more. To distract myself from the food carrier, I immersed myself in my book- “A 3rd serving of the chicken soup for the soul”. I had hardly completed a
few heart-touching stories when I felt something constricting in my
throat and tears welling up in my eyes. Closing the book, I looked out the
window. The endless dark clouds hiding the city lights underneath didn’t help to lift my spirits. One thought led to another and I soon found myself recollecting every
failure, every gloomy thought possible and worrying about what I wanted to do
in future.
I was lost in my own world when I first felt it. A sudden jerk. The plane was no longer flying smoothly. It felt like tribals were
banging the plane from all sides( I do watch too many English movies!).Like a small ferry being tossed by rough waves at sea.The seat
belt sign was turned ON and the captain announced that we have hit a turbulence
and asked us to remain in our seats with the seatbelt on. Every news ever read
on plane crashes that were stacked in some corner of my memory were suddenly thrown into
the limelight and before I could do anything, I found myself recollecting vividly,
not just the news, but every Hollywood movie and book I have read about plane crashes. The expressions on the faces of
the cabin crew didn’t soothe me either.In fact , they just aggravated my fears. Sleeping through it was not even an
option.
I closed my eyes only to remember everyone whom I ever cared
for.When something that we want with all our heart , something that has
occupied every thought, something that we prayed for every single day, doesn’t happen,
we lose faith in God. It can be a goal that we worked very hard for but failed to achieve or it can be someone who has left us forever or anything closer to the heart! We
say that we have just lost faith and the frequent visits to temples almost come to
null. But then, when we are totally lost, we regain our faith in less than a
second and we pray for God’s help to get us through. The ramming continued and
as the altitude dropped down, my thoughts travelled faster than the airplane
and I found myself thinking whether I have lived my life to the fullest and
whether I had any left that I badly wanted to do. I tried to console myself
that I have done everything I ever wanted.A small voice inside screamed “
NOOOO! NOT YET!! I want to be a writer. I want to do something for the lesser
priviledged children.” . I closed my eyes and started fervently praying to
God promising a hundred things.
A few minutes later, I opened my eyes to realise that the flight was smooth again.
The pilot announced the landing and I opened my eyes. Thousands of twinkling
lights seemed to welcome us. There were no trace of clouds and I found myself
wondering whether we had actually hit a turbulence or whether I had imagined it all. Walking out the airport, I realized that, perhaps, deep inside I always
new what I wanted, but it took a turbulence to jerk it out.
